Discussion Series
The Bible & Same-Sex Marriage
We believe that the greatest commandment is twofold: Love God, and love your neighbor as yourself.
We believe that interpreting the Bible in times of controversy is best done in diversity.
And both of these will be forefront as we discuss inclusion of LGBT people in the Christian church.
Focus
Our primary focus is to answer the question, “Can monogamous same-sex couples enter into Christian marriage?” We’ll use Matthew Vines’ (Side A; affirming) and Preston Sprinkle’s (Side B; not affirming) video courses to help answer this question (more on that below). Along the way, we’ll also include:
- Stories from LGBT people
- Understanding principles of bible interpretation – aka hermeneutics
- Perspectives on celibacy by Vines and Sprinkle
Who Is This For?
This discussion series is for all Christians who want to dive deep into scripture, seeking bible themes and principles of biblical interpretation to understand if monogamous same-sex couples can enter into Christian marriage.
Yes, this group is for you if any of the below apply:
- You studied with New City in 2020 – Sprinkle and Vines have new resources that speak directly to each other
- You’re Side A (believe God affirms same-sex marriage)
- You’re Side B (believe God does not affirm same-sex marriage)
- You’re not sure what God thinks about same-sex marriage, but you know that Jesus calls us to love
- You’re a church pastor, leader, or layperson
- You identify as LGBTQ
- You identify as straight and/or cisgender
- You’re a friend or family member of someone who identifies as LGBTQ
When?
We will meet in-person for 10 weeks — every Sunday afternoon at 1:15 PM – 2:30 PM from January 15, 2023 to March 19, 2023.
Where?
- New City Church of LA’s Office at Spring Arts Tower, 453 S. Spring Street, Suite B2, Los Angeles, CA 90013.
- Parking Structure, 545 S. Main St, is a block away.
Are you using a curriculum for this discussion series?
Yes. It is a 10-week discussion series following a curated set of materials from two video courses from organizations that hold differing interpretations on the Bible and same-sex marriage:
Side A — Video Course: The Biblical Case for LGBTQ Inclusion
Watch the trailer!
Matthew Vines, Executive Director, The Reformation Project
Matthew is the founder and Executive Director of The Reformation Project. He is also the author of God and the Gay Christian: The Biblical Case in Support of Same-Sex Relationships, published by Convergent Books in 2014.
In 2012, Matthew delivered a speech at a church in his hometown of Wichita, Kansas, making the case that Christians should affirm gay Christians and their marriage relationships. His speech went viral, having been seen more than a million times and leading to a feature story in The New York Times. In 2013, Matthew launched The Reformation Project to equip and empower Christians to advocate for LGBTQ inclusion in their faith communities. He speaks regularly at churches, universities, and conferences across the country.
Side B — Video Course: Grace/Truth
Watch the trailer!
Preston Sprinkle, President, The Center for Faith, Sexuality & Gender
Preston is a an international speaker, and a New York Times bestselling author who has written numerous books including People to Be Loved: Why Homosexuality Is Not Just an Issue (Zondervan) and Living in a Gray World: A Christian Teen’s Guide to Homosexuality (Zondervan). He also served as the general editor for the new Two Views on Homosexuality, the Bible, and the Church (Zondervan).
How does this discussion series work?
It’s “flipped”, meaning that the teaching will be done as homework via watching the videos/readings assigned from Vines and Preston’s courses. When we get together on Sundays, we will spend most of the time in discussion and learning from one another.
- HOME: At home, you will watch the assigned materials from Vines & Sprinkle – these will mostly be videos and some PDFs to read. In addition, you will answer the 4-5 discussion questions assigned for that week. You will receive these questions one week prior to your Table Group discussion, so that you can take your time to answer them, rather than having to answer them on the spot. Please bring your discussion questions to the in-person meeting at the church office.
- CHURCH OFFICE: When meeting with your Table Group, there will be a discussion of the answers to the discussion questions that you were assigned the week prior.
What would a typical meeting look like?
All Sunday discussion times will follow the same general format (1:15 hours duration):
11:45 AM – Sunday Service Ends, grab lunch at local restaurant, or bring a brown bag lunch
1:10 PM – Finish with eating lunch, and clean tables
1:15 PM – Discussion Start
-
- Table Group Time (45 mins)
- Large Group Time (30 mins)
2:30 PM – Discussion End
What is the cost?
The cost for video materials from Matthew Vines and Preston Sprinkle will be as follows:
- Subsidized Material Fee (Jan 8 last day): $55
- Full Price Material Fee: $70 (If you can afford to do so, you may pay this instead of the subsidized price.)
Please email bssm.leaders@newcitychurchla.com if you need a discount code for hardship assistance.
What are the requirements to join?
- You must commit to watch the video(s) and/or read the assigned reading(s) (about 1 hour per week) before the discussions.
- You must commit to answer the discussion questions (about 1/2 hour per week) before the discussions.
- You must commit to attending the Sunday face-to-face meetings, except when you are out of town or have an emergency.
- You must come with a humble, curious, and open heart.
Who are the leaders of this discussion series?
Pastor Kevin Haah: Kevin is the lead pastor of New City Church of Los Angeles. He is married to Grace and has a child who identifies as bisexual and non-binary. He has led the church into becoming fully inclusive of LGBTQ people.
The Rarelas: Michael & Daniel Rarela have been attending New City Church for 11 years. They got married in 2015, though the wedding was not officiated by a New City Church pastor. Around 2016, they began to slowly have conversations with New City’s pastors about understanding the Bible and same-sex marriage.
While in college, Michael was painfully wrestling with learning that he was gay. During his wrestling, he discovered the former Gay Christian Network’s “Great Debate” essays representing both Side A and Side B perspectives. As someone who was non-affirming at the time, Michael expected the affirming essay to be a fluff argument, but was shocked to discover how biblically grounded it was. Michael became determined to find God’s will for his life through much prayer, research, and Bible reading.
Daniel knew he was gay since before kindergarten, although he did not have the words to describe it at the time. He kept it a secret from everyone he knew, and became especially tormented about it after becoming a Christian at the age of 17. By his early 20s, this was the conclusion he came to, and the message he received from God: “If you can personify 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, you have nothing to apologize for.” With this, as well as Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 13:8, and Micah 6:8 written on his heart, Daniel is committed to strengthening his marriage to Michael, making peace with uncertainty, and learning how to live with all the unanswered questions that inevitably come with being a person of faith.
Terms
- Side A – A biblical perspective that believes that God affirms same-sex marriages.
- Side B – A biblical perspective that belives that God does not affirm same sex marriages, and therefore, gay Christians are called to lifelong celibacy.
- Table Group – A small group of perhaps 6-8 people for you to build trust with to participate in a guided discussion.
FAQs
This is important, but I don’t know what to say in the table groups. What about my anxieties?
Yes, this discussion series addresses one of the crucial questions of our time, so it’s natural that your emotions are strong, as you may feel the stakes are high.
To understand the tone and safety of the conversation please read the Discussion Guide (PDF).
Will lunch be provided?
Generally, no. Participants are welcome to get lunch before each session, and also bring lunch to each session. The church will provide minimal food for those unable to afford lunch.
What is the “Table Group Lunch” week?
There will be one Table Group Lunch during the discussion series. It’s a time to come together, and enjoy a meal with no homework, and feel free to talk about anything – music, sports, etc! If you end up talking about the Bible and same sex marriage, that’s okay too, but it’s not necessary for that week. The main objective here is for you to bond with your group while going on this journey together.
Will I remain with the same Table Group?
Yes – everyone will be placed in Table Groups during the Week 1 Kickoff Meeting, and you’ll remain meeting with the same table group throughout the discussion series. This is toward building trust and allowing the conversation to flow.
What if I have to miss a week?
It’s understandable that you may have to miss a week or two. If you have to miss a Sunday in person meeting, please let your table group know and keep up with the videos/readings and discussion questions. Also consider, if you cannot attend in-person for one week, you can attend virtually for a week.
Can I attend virtually?
Yes, sometimes people get ill and cannot attend in person; so, yes, but for only one or two sessions. In person discussions will be a big part of the discussion series, because it’s easier to communicate.
Be sure to let your table group know well in advance, and designate someone to bring a laptop for Zoom video.
Will there be childcare?
No, there won’t be childcare. If you are a parent, we encourage you to find a childcare option that works best for you so you can concentrate on the materials and group discussions.
Where is parking, and is there a fee?
Parking is available at LA Garage Associates Parking Structure, 545 S. Main St. While there is a parking garage fee, New City Church will provide parking validation every week, which you can pick up at the meeting. There is a suggested donation of $5 per validation.
I don’t attend New City; can I join?
Yes! Regardless of which church you call home, we hope that the materials covered in this discussion series will be useful for you.
I don’t attend New City; tell me more about New City Church and its policy regarding LGBT people and same-sex marriage?
Learn more about New City Church on the About Page, and read New City’s LGBTQ Statement and Policy (2020) about LGBTQ people and same-sex marriage.
Do I need access to a computer?
Yes, but you can also use your phone as long as you have access to the Internet.
During sign-up, why are you asking where I lean, regarding affirming same-sex marriage?
We want to place people into diverse Table Groups, and we’ll use the information that you provide during signup to help balance the table groups toward richer discussion.
I participated in the 2020 “A Journey into LGBTQ Conversation.” Is this for me?
Yes! This discussion series is different from 2020 in that there’s a greater focus on discussion, participant expression, and building relationships. You’ll also find that the new materials from Vines and Sprinkle address each other’s points a bit better than their books, which we studied during the previous LGBTQ conversation.
How do I sign-up?
Fill out the Sign-up Form. Please sign up by January 8, 2023, and don’t forget “early bird” pricing until December 23.
Discussion Guide
The Discussion Guide (PDF) is designed to help all participants understand the goals of the discussion series, and understand the structure of the table groups. It also contains tips to make it safe for everyone to add their meaning to the shared pool. It’s broken down into these sections:
- Goals
- Discussion Structure
- Healthier Conversation Tips
- Tips for Reducing Tension
- Vocabulary
The Syllabus
Out the 10 weeks:
For 8 Sundays, a week prior you will receive both:
- Assigned Materials – to watch/read at home (~1 hr)
- Discussion Questions – to answer at home in your paper notebook (~1/2 hr)
For 2 Sundays, there will be no assigned videos/readings (i.e. Week 1, Week 4).
| In Person Meeting Date | Theme | |
| Week 1
Jan 15, 2023 1:15pm |
Kick Off | In Person Time
|
| Week 2
Jan 22, 2023 1:15pm |
The Invitation | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 3
Jan 29, 2023 1:15pm |
History of Sexuality | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 4
You Choose Date & Time |
Table Group Lunch | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
Table Group Lunch
|
| Week 5
Feb 12, 2023 1:15pm |
History of Sexuality (cont.) | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 6
Feb 19, 2023 1:15pm |
Gender Complementarity & Celibacy | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 7
Feb 26, 2023 1:15pm |
Gender Complementarity & Bible Texts | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 8
Mar 5, 2023 1:15pm |
Bible Texts | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 9
Mar 12, 2023 1:15pm |
Side B Marriage, Celibacy & More | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
| Week 10
Mar 19, 2023 1:15pm |
Side A Marriage and More | Assigned Materials
In Person Time
|
REVISED: Dec 31, 2022